Friday, August 16, 2013

Just for today

Today, 33 years ago, my mama walked down the aisle and married my pops. In three weeks, I'll do the same. Well, minus the marry my pops part. Like her though, I'll be marrying a bearded, plaid-wearing man who is cool for not trying to be, who loves me, who makes me laugh. Like her, back 33 years ago, I'm getting nervous and excited and extremely happy. Three decades ago, she started her life with my dad, and started a chain of events that changed many lives for the better. 

As I prepare to do as my mama did 33 years ago, I'm feeling poignant. Although my dad tells me all the time how like her I am, this is the first time I know for sure that we've felt the same feelings. Now, we've both picked a man to marry, picked a white dress, flowers, a DJ. 

There'll be no room for sadness on my wedding day. It'll be a happy, happy, happy day.  But today, just for today, I'll allow myself to think about my mama - how sad I am for her that she'll miss it, how much she would have loved Damien, how excited she would have been. How she and my dad would have danced all night and how he would have told her to stop looking so good, cause she was outshining the bride. How she would have laughed and rolled her eyes, but then held him a little closer.  

How beautiful she would have been, 33 years later.